Most priests would rather do ten baptisms than one wedding. Or maybe two funerals. Why? Weddings are often overly focused on the incidentals (the reception hall, the reception food, the dress, the flowers, the color of the groomsmen’s tuxes) than the, um, sacrament. At baptisms, on the other hand, people are relaxed and able to enter what really matters. And at funerals believers are more focused on God, rather than what the corpse is wearing. So I always wish that brides and grooms (and fathers of, and mothers of) were more attentive to the marriage rite than the "wedding event."
At the same time, it’s important for priests and deacons to understand what a big day this is for the bride and groom and that, like it or not, they have their own desires for their wedding. Plus they are often facing family and cultural pressures beyond their control.
Those are rocky shoals for both the couple and the priest.
That’s why I was so tickled to hear about Bustedhalo’s new webisode, called "The Princess, the Priest and the War for the Perfect Wedding." In it, Dr. Christine Whelan, is an Iowa-based social historian, professor, journalist and author of "Marry Smart: The Intelligent Woman’s Guide to True Love, and Why Smart Men Marry Smart Women" has an ongoing, and funny conversation with EricAndrews CSP is the pastor of Blessed John XXIII parish, which serves as the Catholic campus ministry for the University of Tennessee in Knoxville." Both of them talk openly and honestly about their desires, fears and questions about planning the so-called "Perfect Wedding."
James Martin, SJ