Overview:

Wednesday of the Eighth Week in Ordinary Time

A Reflection for Wednesday of the Eighth Week in Ordinary Time

Then James and John, the sons of Zebedee,
came to Jesus and said to him,
“Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.”
He replied, “What do you wish me to do for you?”
They answered him,
“Grant that in your glory
we may sit one at your right and the other at your left.”
Jesus said to them, “You do not know what you are asking.”

Find today’s readings here.

Personal desire clashing with God’s plan for us is something that I’m sure everyone has struggled with at one time or another. And learning to let go of this desire can be incredibly difficult. In today’s readings, James and John are distracted by their aspirations. They wish to be on either side of Jesus as he rules over the kingdom of God. But Jesus refutes their desire and tells them: “It shall not be so among you.” He reminds them of the importance of servant leadership and recenters their desires. 

In my own life, I think of school projects where I was monopolizing too much control of the project and a teacher needed to pull me aside and ask me to work more collaboratively. I think of working on short film sets during my college years where crew members tried to take too much control, where the director pulled them aside and asked them to focus instead on the end goal. In these circumstances one throughline is clear: a focus on one’s own desires rather than a better final product. In other words, paths to fulfillment are clouded by desire.

Recently, as my year as an O’Hare fellow is coming to an end, I have been searching for a new job. I’ve been trying to gauge where I should go next. As I’ve reflected on my desires for next year and where I might end up, I’ve wondered if these desires are pointing me toward the path God wants me to take. I’ve been resistant to certain types of positions and locations. I’ve yearned for certain characteristics in a position and want a certain amount of creative license wherever I work. But as I read today’s Gospel, I couldn’t help but wonder if these desires are clouding my ability to see where God wants me; if I’m avoiding God’s plan rather than listening to where God wants me.  

Like James and John in today’s Gospel, circumstances that are clouded by desire require refocusing on the end goal. If one person desires too much, it can come at the expense of something better they may not be aware of. The same can be said for living one’s life with skewed desires. If we continuously yearn for power or desire things outside of God’s plan for us, it will ultimately lead to less fulfillment in our lives. 

Attempting to stay on the path God is leading us on is difficult. Our personal desires and aspirations will sometimes clash with the path God wants us to follow. But, as in today’s Gospel, even the Apostles strayed from this path and made mistakes. I hope to keep this lesson in mind as I journey through the job search process and make sure my desires do not veil where God wants me. And I’m sure as with James and John, God will gently remind me to stay on the path along the way.

William Gualtiere is an O'Hare Fellow at America.